Karen and Alan’s Relationship Guidelines

Having a happy relationship is one of the greatest foundations for happiness, health, wealth, well-being and satisfaction in life. Below are the guidelines my beloved Alan and I follow. They have guided us through the storms, the setbacks and the challenges we faced as we made the journey to living a high vibrational life. We define a high vibrational life as a life rich with love, kindness and respect.
Remember, there is no judgment here. We get that you are doing the best you can with what you know. Our message is to inspire you to achieve a higher level of mental and emotional mastery so you can break the chains of the past and fully live your life by design.
One: Your Beliefs About Your Partner Create Your Experience
Have you ever been with a friend and all they did was talk negatively about their spouse/partner? Then they wonder why they are not happy in their relationship. What is important to understand is that any negative beliefs you have about your partner will create unnecessary suffering. Your negative beliefs will have you seeing the worst and only focusing on your partner’s faults and flaws. When you choose to stop thinking negatively about your beloved, they will begin to act differently. Your thoughts are very powerful especially when you add the fuel of emotions.
Exercise: Write down ten negative beliefs you have about your partner and realize just how much you have been unconsciously creating the problem. (Example: “My husband is always yelling,” changes to, “I was taught to yell when I needed someone to pay attention to me and now I choose to find a new empowered way of communicating and respecting my beloved. Or, “My wife does not respect me,” changes to, “My wife respects me.” You receive what you believe.
Take a deep breath. Shifting the focus back onto you is key to self-mastery. Now you can write a list of new empowered beliefs, and you will begin to see things that you did not appreciate begin to melt away and the things you positively FOCUS on will begin to be the reality.
Two: Create the “No Yelling” Policy
Peace in the home begins with making a conscious choice to stop raising our voice. Yelling at each other is an unhealthy habit you most likely picked up from your parents when you were a child. We were taught that if I want this person to listen to me I need to raise my voice. The truth is most people shut down when being yelled at. A new empowered habit is to connect with your Self Mastery Tone, which is your normal and kind voice with assertiveness mixed in. When you are being yelled at you are not being respected and when you are yelling you are not respecting another. Make a “No Yelling” Policy in your home and you will discover more empowering ways of communicating that will make everyone feel more at ease and happy.
Three: Find Agreement
Many couples that are headed for divorce or separation are the ones who can never find agreement no matter what the topic is. He says black and she says white. This is the cycle of “Power Struggle” and the “ego” reigns supreme. The ego will never make you happy, it is always seeking to be right or have its way. When you are connected to your soul you will always want your partner to be happy. When you both come from this perspective of focusing on each other’s, “divine nature” you will always find a way to share four powerful words, “You are absolutely right.” Then you can say, “I hear what you’re saying, you are absolutely right, I see why you believe that.”
Four: Uplift, Inspire and Encourage
This means No More Name Calling! When couples call each other names it means there is a self within we call the ‘Inner Bully’ and this self feels insecure and unloved. The old model of relationships is when I feel hurt I will hurt you back. In the Evolution of Relationship model, when you feel hurt you know there is some personal development work you need to do to heal your inner bully. Here you seek to find more effective and healthy ways of expressing your emotional pain.
Five: Focus on Similarities and Respect Differences.
Instead of focusing on flaws and faults begin today to focus on your beloved’s beautiful soul. We all have different ways of seeing the world and whether one is more optimistic than the other, each must be respected for their values, beliefs and ideas. Now write a list of ten things you both love, appreciate and enjoy about life. Then every day remind yourself how blessed you are to have this person in your life. Remember, your differences can bring forth incredible opportunities of grow and expand your world.
Six: Never compare your present partner with your past relationships.
Sometimes your partner may not understand just how much comparing him or her to someone in your past will affect them. One of the lowest blows you could ever deliver to a woman or man is telling them you wish they were more like someone else. This way of thinking may cause the person you love to pull away or close him or her off to you. There’s nothing that drives a person to be the best they can be when you let them know you believe in them, respect them, and have high expectations for them.
Seven: Be Grateful for The One You are With
Do you know what it took for the universe to bring you both together? Did you know that you both have specific life lessons to learn through each other? These lessons can only be learnt if you have a WILLINGNESS to listen to each other. The willingness only occurs when you are grateful for the one you are with. When you are grateful for the one you are with you are focusing on their soul and the kindness that exists within their heart. Remember there is the personality of the person you are with and there is also their soul essence. When you are in gratitude there is no way you can be angry or resentful. Gratitude is one of the highest vibrational qualities and is the fastest way to spiral up above the line. Write ten reasons why you are grateful to be with your beloved.
Eight: Laugh and Have FUN!!
Find ways to laugh with life. We all experience challenges that we need to face in life and these challenges offer life lessons. If we are in resistance to learning these lessons we will experience unnecessary suffering. The universe intended for us to enjoy our time on this planet. When you stop judging others and especially yourself for past mistakes, you begin to cultivate a sense of humour allowing for more harmony to be created in your relationships. You are not here to laugh “at” others. You are here to laugh “with” others.
Nine: No More Blame
You are responsible for how you feel. Every time you are triggered it means you still have some limited beliefs about yourself that you are being called to heal and transform. This is a precious gift your beloved is giving you. The gift of clearing old wounds and seeing life with new eyes. When you stop blaming each other for how you feel and what has happened and begin to take responsibility for your own well being, all your circumstances begin to change to a positive. It can be a challenge to admit how you feel however it is the key to living a high vibrational life. To be able to admit that you are feeling fear, that you are feeling insecure, that you are feeling angry or frustrated is the first step to emotional mastery and restoring love in any relationship.
There are many more guidelines to follow, however; these are what Alan and I use to create a beautiful life together.
Remember, there is a reason the universe brought you both together and the more you remember what you both love, appreciate and enjoy about each other,the more you spiral up into a high vibrational life of joy, harmony and connection.
Karen Klassen

Karen and Alan own Imagine Seminar and Coaching. We are passionate about sharing higher ideas on how we can all rise up, embrace our purpose and live a beautiful life. If you are ready to Live a High Vibrational Life in your relationships or business contact us today.

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